Linh's Personal Statement

The image of an eight-year-old child sitting at a dining table eating her dinner with tears filling her little round eyes and streaking her chubby cheeks always linger in my memory. The girl just sat there and cried, but no one seemed to care. That little girl was me. Since I was six-year-old, I have heard my parents arguing about money issues weakening their already fragile relationship. They argued every minute that they were together. All they focused on were each other’s mistakes and faults. This taught me that love and happiness can be negatively affected by money. Therefore, I made a commitment to find a good career and not let money dominate my life.

However, my dream of getting into a good college and obtaining a successful career seemed out of reach. Our family did not even have a permanent place to stay. Our old house in Ca Mau, a city in Vietnam, was burned down after a fire when I was six. No one knew the cause but it cost us our home. We moved to Bac Lieu, a small town in Vietnam, hoping for a fresh start. We had to stay in a sub-standard house with leaking roof because we could not afford a better accommodation. As a result, during the rainy season, our house flooded. The living room was our kitchen and we slept with plastic bags over our beds. Lying on my bed with the chilly wind piercing through my body, feelings of self-pity and hopelessness washed over me and left me crying night after night.

I remember an old saying from my country, “God loves those who have a good soul.” If this is true, then He loves me. He had spared me some luck and given me hope when the news came that my family was moving to the U.S. Already living in the U.S., my grandpa would tell me about life there whenever he came back to visit. He said that in America, schools are public, and they even serve you free lunch. After high school, the government would provide money for college expenses. Now that I was going to America, my dream could come true.

I moved to the U.S. at the age of twelve. Everything was new to me: school, culture, people, and especially the language. I had a hard time at school because of the language barrier. I adapted quickly, thanks to a tutor at my school. Since she spoke some Vietnamese, she would teach me new words and translate them for me one at a time. Beside the language barrier in school, I also had to face pressure at home. My family and I lived with our aunties and uncles. They disliked and looked down on us because we were poor, and they felt that we did not contribute enough financially. I sometimes heard my parents sobbing at night, and I too cried from the anger and shame they made us feel. Although a part of that feeling of bitterness will never completely vanish, I decided not to let it get in my way. Rather, I will use it as a constant reminder to push myself forward.

My mom and dad were consumed with working days and nights in order to earn the money to provide my siblings and me a better life and future. After a year, they looked worn-out and lifeless. My mom complained about her aching back and her weakening eyesight while my dad suffered constant headaches. I wanted to ease their pain but did not know how. For this reason, I want to go to a good college and have a good career, so I can support my parents in the future.

I was known as the quiet little girl sitting alone in the corner of the class. People around me remembered me by my timid personality. I would sit in a class all day and not say a word. There were ideas popping out of my head whenever the teacher asked the class a question, but I never had the courage to voice my opinions. I worried about my accent and feared that people would laugh at my mispronunciation. It haunted me every time I tried to engage in any discussion. I was tired of letting my insecurity hold back my ideas and thoughts, so I tried to confront it by pushing myself to try new things to improve.

Over the summer of 2006, I participated in a leadership program with hopes to gain self-confidence and communication skills as well as to conquer my fear of public speaking. Here, they taught me how to plan activities and be comfortable with myself. However, after two months of work, I felt that nothing had changed. Fear was still holding me back. As I was stepping into my junior year, I joined another leadership program called Au Co Vietnamese Youth Team to continue building skills. Through my community services and cultural dance performances, I felt a light of hope had ignited. Each performance strengthened and boosted my confidence. I could feel that my fear was lessened. My hard work had finally paid off. I knew that I had triumphed over my shy and timid personality when I stepped on the stage with self-confidence, while I was performing at the Cherry Blossom Festival in Japantown. I had gained not only confidence on stage but also in myself. It enabled me to feel comfortable with myself and voice my opinion in and outside of class.

I tried, and I succeeded. I did not give up after my first attempt but persevered without fear of failing. The outcome was astounding because I am not the little shy girl in the corner any more. I stood up for myself and no longer afraid to voice my opinions. I had learned that once I put my mind to a goal and try my best, the results are endless. I am proud of this accomplishment because I grew strong enough to challenge myself to pursue my dreams.